Home Sweet Home

Dad,
You are finally home. You are sitting in YOUR chair, wearing YOUR clothes, eating YOUR food. I love that home feels like home again. The transition hasn't been a piece of cake for you. Maneuvering around the kitchen with your walker has become an annoyance to you, the chair in the shower isn't ideal, and having me and mom follow steps behind you like stalkers can be smothering...however, you are home!!! The smile on your face has returned, the jig in your step (or shuffle) is more noticeable, and the sneaky crinkling of a bag of chips can be heard again. ahhhhhh....did this house miss you.
You and I spent all morning making phone calls to doctors, insurance companies, and the rehab center. I'm thinking we could run a telemarketing business rather well. Later, I found you crawling on the floor doing your exercises (and was impressed by your initiative). It has truly been a unique and eventful morning back home.
When we finally sat down together to relax, I began to share about all of the amazing blessings God has given our family during this time. I mentioned this story:
As I was on my run yesterday, I turned off my headphones and began to have a conversation with God. It began with my asking him why someone so faithful to Him could be going through so much financially, physically, and emotionally. I begged him to bestow some blessings on the situation and on you for all you are going through. I prayed for the house to sell, for your healing, and for strengthened spirits and favor. Then I got silent. So many things began to flood my mind- financial support from others, acts of kindness from those around us, your ability to walk again, and the strength of our family. I realized that He HAS supported us, given us favor, and blessed us.
You said simply this: "I have been blessed beyond what I deserve or had to give.
Don’t let Satan rob you of the reminders of how good God has been.
I also heard you on the phone with a friend (I wasn't eavesdropping!). You mentioned that you couldn't imagine walking through this without the support you have been given from family and friends, but also without the hope of Jesus Christ. I see it shining through you as you gain your strength and I am thankful you remind me to be aware of the blessings God has given us. It truly reminds me of the song "Blessings" by Laura Story:
"Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise"

Amen, Dad.

Cabin Fever

Dad,
We were finally given the green light from the doctors to get you ready to head to rehab! I'm so excited...and can only imagine how you feel. I sense your cabin fever. Does this describe how you feel?




Hopefully we will say "peace out" to Northwestern in the next day or so. You and I found it humorous when we discovered a "Patient Welcome" pamphlet on the counter in your room. I'm assuming you could write one of those for the hospital at this point. As soon you as are outta here I'm turning in my "city driving" badge and putting on my oven mitts. How does "Pizza Meatloaf" sound on the menu? (homemade, not hospital made!)

Dad,
After sneaking you some frozen yogurt, sharing my goldfish crackers, and keeping both wheels of the wheelchair on the ground for our walk today, I think I earned your trust! :) You interrupted the silence in the hospital room today with a request for some devotional time. You listened and gave simple "Amens" and sighs of agreement as I read a week's worth of devotionals from my phone. The improvisation of daily iphone devotionals left the same impact on us both as reading from a renowned best-seller. It brought back to mind the number of mornings I would wake for school to find you sitting in solace reading your worn brown, leather Bible at the head of the kitchen table. Years later I realized that it was not only for our family, but also for daily bread for yourself, that you began each new day this way. Today I pray that our time together and the words from the devotional spoke to you and gave you daily bread to carry you through the difficult moments of doubt, worry, or fear you may encounter in your alone time within those hospital walls. May Christ meet you there and may you sense His presence strong and clear.

Dad,
Today is father's day.
I love you more than words could express.
I love our BUTTERFLY kisses.
I love the way you scratch with your beard.
I love that I'm still not too big to cuddle with you in a chair.
I love how you laugh AT me...which for some reason I don't mind.
I love the way you always seem to have the answer.
I love the way you treat my husband as one of your own sons.
I love your wit and how you wiggle humor into every conversation.
I love the laugh that comes from your belly and shows all your teeth.
I love how REAL you are, always opening up to gentle give your true thoughts.
I love how you still wear black shoes with a brown belt.
I love how you let me know you are proud of me.
I love you'll do anything for a joke...including removing your teeth.
I love hearing you yell at the tv when our Cubbies are on...you are a realistic fan.
I love that you cry with me and celebrate with me.
I love how your arms go all the way around me in a Bear Hug.
I love how through this journey we have been on these last few months, you have never seemed anything less than the dad I have known and loved for 25 years.


Love you daddy.
Happy daddy day!

Love,
Squirt

Oops! You did it again!

Dad,
Lately, you are always trying to make me an accomplice in your daring feats. Today, you were determined to get into a standing position. You proceeded to tell me that you were given the "ok" to try this with someone present. Your determination enabled you to get to your feet, yet at the same moment an alarm began to sound. "Way to go!" I antagonized. Sure enough, they were smart enough to place a "bed exiting alarm" underneath you. Although this was hilarious at the moment, I realized that this totally describes you! You are successful and an example because of this determination.
I distinctly recall a simple "hike" you once encouraged mom, Rich, and I to embark on while on vacation in Tennessee. This trail was supposed to lead us to a hidden waterfall. Flip-flops on our feet, clad in t-shirts and shorts, we began the hike mom promised would be "short and sweet." Three miles later and on a steep incline, I believe it was you and Mom huffing and puffing behind us. You pushed us onward, however, wanting us to experience the treasure at the end of our journey. After passing experienced hikers carrying their camel packs of water, we finally reached the gorgeous waterfall. You both gave Rich and I that "told you so" look and at that moment I realized that your persistence was part of your plan. You taught us that the back-breaking work, effort, and at times doubting moments, are all a piece of success.
Although I don't condone your "jail-breaking" ways as of lately, I appreciate and admire your innate desire to work for the prize. I believe this is what God sees of your life and why we are noticing the fruits of your labor growing so abundantly in relationships and support around us. Never give up. Never lose hope. Let go of doubt. Hold on to your greatest attributes, your determination, and the Father that guides us through seemingly never-ending paths to His unmatchable rewards.

We came a BIT more prepared years later:

Revived

As I revisited my blog, I was amazed to realize how long I have been on "hiatus" from writing. It's surprising that whether you are on a mountain top or valley, life just seems to get ahead of you. It took what is going on in life at the moment for me to rediscover my passion for written expression. It is through written words that so many things can surface: emotions, events, and a storage place for present-day memories.

It is not a secret that things have been a bit unstable within our family. Dad is still in the hospital and doctors await further tests and developments before we can grasp what is going on his body. The beautiful Sidell twins have arrived and each coo and smirk melts our hearts. Finally, my third year of teaching, and first at the 5/6 level has come to a close. These past few months can be summed up in contradictory forms: successful, difficult, tumultuous, eye-opening, breath-taking, blessed.....

My over-arching goal of returning to this long-lost link, is to record both struggles and moments of joy that God places in my life during this journey we have begun with Dad. I'm hoping that these journal entries remind both dad and myself of how time in the valley is full of God's gentle whispers and kisses of His love and faithfulness.


Thursday June 16th, 2011

Daddy,
I've never wished for summer vacation more! As a kid we ached for pool parties & fireflies. Last night I sat on the back porch watching the fireflies and they seemed to have lost their luster. Antsy adolescents look forward to group dates, midnight movies, and shopping sprees. In adulthood overwhelming responsibilities outside of a career sometimes make a "vacation" seem bittersweet....as the word has lost its once attractive meaning. This year it has developed a whole new meaning. I wouldn't consider these next 3 months a "break" but as a "blessing" That word is much sweeter. I'm able to be here at the hospital with you. Whether I'm diving back into my final "Twilight" book, fiddling on facebook, or discouraging you from daringly leaving your bed for the chair, I'm enjoying every moment. I can be where our family needs me, when they need me. Never have I felt more honored to be a servant. You have always been that to your family.

Today you seemed alert and talkative. When you heard that rehab may mean several days, you were discouraged and your demeanor changed. I can't blame you. I shared how I've been held up by the song "Blessings", which exudes the message of the way that sometimes it takes rain for us to be reminded that God is our solid ground and through it we see evidence of his mercy and faithfulness. I pray this holds you up today and throughout this journey...no matter its length or course.


On a lighter note, I'm looking forward to the wheelchair ride you promised to let me steer you on today. Although I believe the phrase, "poppin' wheels" may have deterred you and dissolved some of your trust in me as a driver, I'm hopin' for more laughs today!

Amen

I had heard the phrase "God comes through...even in the 11th hour." I'm sure that I have experienced this, but it's not easy to remember that when you are in the "valley." JP and I have truly learned to depend on Christ, and one another, this year. God is so good and He is faithful. He worked out every detail....and I will be teaching 3rd grade the rest of the year in a wonderful district! I have no idea how these wrinkles got ironed out, but I know who did it!

THANK YOU, JESUS!

Busy

JP has been gone this weekend, on a guys trip to see Alabama vs LSU football. While he was enjoying himself, I surprisingly not only kept myself busy, but had a great weekend of ME time. It's not to be selfish for a little while.

Friday- spent the night at my grandparents. Got my grandma her Steak and Shake strawberry shake (we have that love in common). My cousins and aunt and uncle were there as well. God has obviously placed me at the school in Schaumburg at the right time. I'm able to stop and spend time with family, with absolute convenience. Grandma and I watched "The Proposal." I love hearing her laugh.

Saturday- Grandma and I made homemade Cavatelli (gnoochi). It was rather easy, yet time consuming. I very much appreciated my grandma taking her time and energy to do this with me. I have a high appreciation for those who used to homemake their own pasta, like my Grandma. Grandpa slept most of my visit. He sleeps a lot right now. Although this makes me sad, I know it's better to be asleep than to constantly struggle with his pain.

Later on Saturday, I went for a beautiful run in the nature center. It was great to clear my head! Then I went to a movie with my mom and mother-in-law. It's a blessing that these two enjoy each other's company and we have JP and I in common. The movie, "Couples' Retreat," was not so great.

Sunday- today's agenda included sleeping in, runnning with my sister, grocery shopping, and working on report cards.

This has been a ME weekend. Is that a terrible thing?

Taste of Heaven

I'm spending the night with my grandparents tomorrow night. I can't get enough time with my grandpa, knowing I don't know how much is left. I have been praying for any opportunity to talk to him about Jesus. When I think about the idea of him in heaven, it makes me smile. The promise of heaven itself makes me smile....and I want to make sure that those I love, are there with me. (That includes you, Pipa).

Pipa,
I pray the Lord opens doors for me to introduce you to this amazing God. You introduced me to tastes of Italy,now I pray that I can plant the seed that gives you a taste(and promise) of an eternity in heaven!

Love,
your Precious

Ahhhhhhhhhh.......

Why does home feel so nice when you aren't feeling well?

I can get through my day just thinking about cuddling up with a movie, hot cocoa, a blanket, and JP.

It sounds like the perfect way to make me feel better when I'm under the weather.

Only time will tell

My Grandpa is not doing well. His doctor's are not saying much. He's beginning to talk about waking in the middle of the night with fear...complaining he is sick and when I ask how, he replies "my mind." It's so sad. I spoke quickly and reminded him that fear is not from God. I so want him to know and accept Christ, to live the time he has, in peace. We talked about taking things a day at a time, that God goes a step ahead of us. "When you are scared," I replied, "Read those scriptures verses we posted on your dresser. I pray they bring you peace and rest at night.
Not more than 10 minutes later, he and I discussed my job situation. I proceeded to honestly tell him I'm not sure what will happen in two weeks when I hand my classroom back to the lead teacher. He could sense the worry (and fear) in my eyes. He said, "remember....no worries. Right?" Although he went on to reassure me further, discussing housing options with him, and sharing his pride in my hard work, that phrase, "no worries, right?" followed me all night. He was right. I had just shared a devotion on taking things one day at a time, and fear not being from God, and here, that's how I have been operating. I'm glad, my Grandpa, who I am trying to lead to Christ, led me back to these reminders, and this truth, with that 3 word phrase, "no worries, right?"

Organizado

Following the last post about my closet, I've decided I need to remain on the topic of organization...therefore, my goal being organization. I'm an "outside" organizer. The kind that is obsessive (at times) about things on the outside being organized. I pick and choose what I will be obsessive about, whether that be an edge being straight or decorative pillows all showing the same angle. But....I'd call myself a "Monica" because if you were to open cabinets, closets, files, folders, or a fridge, you would never guess that I knew the meaning of the word "organized." I need to be true to the term, truly making life easier on both the counter tops AND inside the cabinets. This may be a lifelong goal, more than a resolution. It could require a change in my lifestyle. With all of life's daily surprises popping up, especially as a teacher, it feels that this may be difficult to achieve.

Hang it up

Some day, my closet with resemble this paradise (even if that means using an extra bedroom as the clothing storage haven). Until then, I'll have to organize the space I have.

I spent this Columbus Day discovering the bottom of my closet. I wish I could say that it was merely scratching an itch to clean, but fact is, it was my husband's complaining about the slow creeping of my clothes into the 1/8 of the closet he has left. (that and the several times my closet has literally torn the bolts out of the wall). After 3 hours of sifting and sweating through sweaters, shirts, slacks, and shoes, I managed to organize the mess.
While in the process I had trouble throwing out and sorting those things that I truly do not wear. There are so many things that I have saved, but forgotten why: bridesmaid dresses I will never wear again, purses that I have never used, shirts that I don't remember buying, and old letters from junior high friends.
I'm thinking it's about time to get rid of some of these miscellaneous items, if I can't recall why I still save them. So, my one beautiful sister who threw my bridesmaid dress out, won't mind if I decide to get rid of hers after 5 years, right?

What crazy thing have you found amongst your possessions, that you have been saving but can't remember its significance?

Why Hello There

It's been a while. I've missed you so. I love using this spot to blurb, blowup, talk about a blowout, or share blessings. I've experienced all of the above during my blog sabbatical, but with not wanting to relive some of the not so wonderful moments, I'll just keep it short, sweet, and relative to today.

I'm enjoying fall, the changes both in weather and in my life, and cannot wait to see New Moon! (so random).


This pictures sums up the happenings during the absence from the world of blogging: crazy, inconsistent, exciting, and all worth the while!

More magic

I had to include this one! I just found it and can't wait to try it!

Crock Pot Weight Watchers Recipes - Pork Tenderloin in the Slow Cooker

Weight Watchers points: 4 per serving.

Ingredients:

1.50 pound pork tenderloin
1 ounce envelope dry onion soup mix
1 cup water
3/4 cup red wine
3 tablespoons minced garlic
3 tablespoons soy sauce
freshly ground black pepper to taste

How to prepare the Tenderloin in the Slow Cooker:

Place pork tenderloin in a slow cooker with the contents of the soup packet.

Pour water, wine, and soy sauce over the top, turning the pork to coat.

Carefully spread garlic over the pork, leaving as much on top of the roast during cooking as possible.

Sprinkle with pepper, cover, and cook on low setting for 4 hours.

Serve with cooking liquid on the side.

Crockpot Magic

I have found that with mine and JP's long days and busy work schedules, that a crock pot is my best friend. Here's the latest recipe I tried:

Weight Watchers Glorified Crock Pot Pork Chops
1 medium onion (chopped)
1 1/2 pounds pork chops
1/4 cup water
1 can cream of celery soup
pepper to taste

Put pork chops in bottom of crock pot, onions on top of chops, pour can of celery soup over onions, pour 1/4 cup water over all. Cook for 8 hours on low, or 4 on high. It falls apart. SO GOOD! (and I believe it makes 6 servings and is about 5 points per serving)

Color My World

After trying my hand at painting and creativity, I've decided I am better at art than I thought. It was never my strong suit in school. I am a testimony to the misnomer that lefties are the more creative type. What a misconception. I thought simple abstract art would be easy and carefree, but when you put a perfectionist to the task, the task is daunting. I found myself perfecting each stroke and line, which is the antithesis of the specific art form. It was like revisiting my elementary school art room, where even the legs on my stick people took hours to make flawless (a detail I still cannot do easily today). I now remember why I do not enjoy art....I'm a type A personality. Art as a relaxation method? Try telling that to a Monica!


Needless to say, after hours of perfecting color tones....these are the products (original art, that I will never produce or attempt again).


(Special thanks to the second artists on this one, Sharon Sidell)

long time no see

Dear Diary,

It's been a while since we've spoken. I've been so very busy. This summer has flown by. We have had weddings, celebrated anniversaries, vacationed, and entertained family and friends. Time flies when you are having fun. These things are what remind me of how blessed I am for love, joy, family, and provision. I love that God gives us excitement, relaxation, and celebrations to remind us to enjoy our life!
Thought I would give a photo diary of some of the summer's events.



celebrating our 1 year anniversary downtown

Vacation to visit JP's family on the Jersey Shore

Kim & Brent's Wedding

Cubbies game with my parents

4th of July (getting over my fear of sparklers)

shopping list

I can never seem to stay stocked up. Between make-up, toiletries, and other necessities, I can't seem to make ONE trip! They always seem to go empty ONE AT A TIME! These are the most recent purchases I've had to make or will be making this week....

-foundation
-loose powder
-mascara
- feminine products
-hairspray
-conditioner
-shampoo
-eye makeup remover

Although I can live without these....I can't!

350 degrees

I love trying new recipes or altering traditional recipes to be more nutritional. I try to enjoy less carbs......which is impossible for an italian!

I tried a new one today. I lightly breaded chicken breasts, baked them, and then laid them on top of a bed of spaghetti squash topped with spaghetti sauce. It was delicious and as you can guess, an alternative to chicken Parmesan.

On another note, a cute recipe I was given by a family friend is now going down as the most practical and easy in my cookbook...............

Roast Beef
1 Large Roast of Beef
1 Small Roast of Beef
*Place both Roasts in the oven. When the small roast burns, the large roast is finished. Easy enough